venti, venti, venti!

fairly late in the afternoon, i realized i hadn’t had any caffiene today. there are times when that wouldn’t be a big deal; this isn’t one of them. i kept waiting for the headache to hit. it never did, but at some point it dawned on me that the reason why i had no motivation or energy was because of a caffiene deficit.

the happy 9th and broad street places seemed to be closed-ish (ok, i didn’t knock on every door), so i headed over to the soulless corporate coffee tap.

i ordered, then reached for the wallet. i’m digging… i’m digging… ok, my purse isn’t _that_ big… yep. no wallet; i’d pulled it out to buy some things online and it was still sitting on my sofa, back at home.

and then, the guy at the soulless corporate coffee place did something very surprising– he said, “well, why don’t you come back and pay me later? i’ll be here until ten.”

so i walked out with an obscene amount of coffee, drove home, and drove back immediately with the money. i could have not come back, but i figure when an unexpected nice thing occurs, it’s good to reward it with honesty. it’s good for my karma.

“please tell me how to feel.”

bq. “Dear lisa,

bq. My name is marc. I am 18 and have recently bought a new vw bug. Unfortunately I have a slight problem. A female friend of mine told me it was a “girly” car. I on the other hand have been a fan of the old vw bug since I was a little kid – my past nostalgia influencing my current choice. Eh, unfortunately I can’t help but still feel a little self-conscious. So I ask you… do you find the new VW Bug a feminine car? How should I feel? What reactions do men typically receive when driving a new VW Bug?

bq. Also… are you asian? I see you like godspeed you black emperor. They rock. I like your website and the whole roswell premise. I am quite the fan of aliens.

bq. Thank you.”

if you google my first and last name, you will mostly find hits for an asian porn star. poor guy. he thinks he’s found a godspeed-loving asian porn star who makes web sites about vw bugs in her spare time. and wants her to tell him how to feel.

i’m tempted to write back and say, “asian porn stars prefer men who are secure enough in their masculinity to not care if people think they are driving a chick car.” but i probably won’t write back at all.

besides, my sympathy is limited for any 18 year old who has a new car.

my cat hates S&TC.

so i’ve been on another full-blown S&TC kick, dragging out all the dvd’s and watching from season one straight on through. when i get going i can actually get a lot of work done while it’s on, though i have to admit that it’s a distraction as well sometimes. in fact, i met up with sarah and shayne at ooh la today, got there about 15 minutes early and worked in hyper-focus mode while shayne graded papers and we waited for sarah to arrive. got an amazing amount done in just those 15 minutes but i can’t sustain that level of focus for too long.

anyway… i had noticed today that moses was sticking pretty much exclusively to the bedroom, which is unusual. usually if i’m working in the living room, he’s right by my side– but not today. it was kind of freaking me out– since franny died without warning, i’m always trying to be on the alert for signs of illness, especially since cats will hide illness and injury for as long as possible.

i reached S&TC saturation point a short while ago, and finally shut the tv off altogether.

and soon thereafter, in wanders moses. he’s sitting next to me on the sofa, in his usual position, as i write this– for the first time today.

creepy lawn guy re-earns his name

ok, i’ll start by saying that i have mixed feelings about this guy, and there’s a part of me that knows it’s wrong to dismiss a human being as “creepy lawn guy”.

but i’m tellin’ ya…

i was working on the westy, which means that i was bending over. yes, my ass was out there for all to see. so creepy lawn guy comes by and says, “whoo-HOO!” and the really weird thing is that it _wasn’t_ creepy. i turned around and said, “heyyyyyy” (like, “hey, stop it!”) and somehow it was a friendly moment. he said it was great that i got a van.

today i was out working on the beetle. at this particular moment, i was _not_ bending over. i think i was sitting on the ground. i hear the clunk clunk of his fucked up bicycle coming up behind me, and he says in his soft creepy voice, “hey lisa”. i sort of turn and say hey, and he says in an even softer, creepier voice, “you look beautiful today”.

somehow the fact that i looked _awful_ made it all the creepier. i caught a glimpse of myself in one of the hubcaps, thinking, “do i look beautiful?” and i could see that my hair was flying out of its bobby pins, making me look like an insane crazy lady.

the ones that got away

tonight, mary and christa came over to help me suss out my wardrobe for the roswell trip. it can be a little tricky to look nice in an environment where the uniform is shorts (which i refuse to wear right now) and shapeless VW logo t-shirts (which, although i do own more than i would like to admit to, i also refuse to wear). i can’t look too dressed up, and everything has to be practical for driving all day, or running around in the hot desert wind all morning. plus, how do you dress for an alien ball at a zoo, when you also refuse to wear an alien costume? well, we got it all figured out. they even convinced me to wear a pony tail with a pink scarf to further girlify “the very cute PODVISION baseball tee”: that i’ll be wearing during the car show.

anyway! of course, there was a shoe component of the whole fashion show thing. and that got me to thinking about the shoes that got away.

i was in high school. i’d grown up with one, maybe two pairs of immensely practical shoes being purchased for me each year. sandals for summer, something with a closed toe for winter. maybe some sneakers. the notion of having additional pairs of shoes was quite novel, but i did occasionally buy myself a really compelling pair with my babysitting money. i remember feeling _quite_ extravagant paying $40 for a pair of heels that i actually still own, and wore constantly in high school.

at this time– ’84? ’85? the vintage look was just starting to take hold in NC. the style that would eventually evolve into “shabby chic” was particularly of interest to me.

i spotted the magical shoes in a botique in north hills. as i recall them, they were black ballet slippers with some kind of beaded encrustment on the toes. they were delicate, beautiful, and little bit goth. i think i must have had a look at the price tag and been shocked. i remember that they were out of the question, even though i loved them _so much._

obviously, i’ve never forgotten them. there’s a few things like that from that era– beautiful things that i couldn’t afford, and never forgot.

i wonder if those shoes are part of the reason i seem to be drawn to ballet slipper style shoes that are flat and have a rounded toe? they’re difficult to wear, yet i have many pairs.

i also gave some thought this evening– out loud– as to whether my shoe buying habit could be considered a problem. mary said, “don’t ask me”. christa declined to comment. my hunger for cute shoes seems to grow with every pair i buy.


ok, i need y’all’s help!!

special note! i need to stock up on fun, accessible music mixes for my trip to roswell. my co-pilot dan is _not_ a jaded indie rocker and i can’t confront him with my crazy music collection. unfortunately, fun and accessible isn’t really my specialty… but i know a bunch of you are quite good at that!!

i’ve got sarah’s “dance party in bed” which i think will be great. sarah, do you have any more like that? georg? christa, maybe a good divaville mix, heavy on the betty hutton? charo? rick, hook me up with donovan and abba and t-rex!! alicia, o queen of pop music? jason, an 80’s mix up your sleeve somewhere? anyone else??

any format! well, cd’s and mp3’s are probably best. or just a playlist that i can try to reproduce from stuff at the station.

she lives!

got some good common sense advice and info from the vanagon list… got the auto parts guy to give me a couple of different belt sizes… and he did some research for me in his book, since the computer information on the diesel vanagon was quite confusing. we based it off of a measurement i had taken and off of what the book said a diesel jetta with the same engine would use. turned out that one was just right. 34.5″, i’ll record it here so i don’t forget. (i have a notebook for this kind of thing, but i need to start it off with a bunch of info and i don’t want to take the time to get it all recorded right now. i’ll do that in july when i really start to get to work on the thang.)

i got the belt on and tensioned with minimal struggle, seems to be correct according to the manuals’ specs (on that one point they do agree). no squealing; no battery light. i watched it go for a little while with the engine cover off. it was fun. cool to see the alternator spinning. i did that!

cycled the glow plugs a few times, got the cold start knob pulled out, and much to my amazement she started _right_ up!! no hesitation, no cranking, and i think much less smoke. it could stil mean i have a bad glow plug– since i cycled them a few times– but it’s good to know that she’s not so hard to start after all.

drove around the block, happily, now she’s parked in the street and spacepod finally gets to hog the driveway.

i’m moving slowly but surely 🙂

time to get to work

so last night i was excited because the alternator belt for the westy had arrived; i had visions of popping it right on and firing the old girl up. ’twas not to be. looks like this belt will fit around two of the pulleys, but not all three.

the charming british shop manual clearly shows a belt going around all three; the bentley manual, which everyone seems to swear by, bears no relation to reality as i know it. unless a lot more than a belt fell off of my alternator– the bently is displaying a picture of something other than the alternator for my van.

neither manual makes any mention of having to remove another belt to get this one on, so that makes me think i’ve got the wrong belt again. (i’d have to remove a belt to get this belt on only the top two pulleys.)

i think i’m gonna have to confess my ignorance on this simple matter to the diesel vanagon list; i feel like an idiot, it’s such a small thing, but i’m at a loss.

anyway, christa came by last night as i was at the height of irritation with the whole situation, and invited me to come to the palais de ‘za with her, mary, and chris r. and i decided, what the hell. i’m going to work my ass off for the next five days– i can have a night of fun.

we had a great time hanging out. after the palais we retired to mary’s genteel porch for many glasses of wine. so many, on my part, that i asked christa to drive us home in the spacepod. she seemed happy about this.

i went to bed happy; woke up to a hangover-fueled dream of roswell. the last thing i dreamed was that this guy charlie, who is kind of an interesting character, who has come up from georgia for the last two roswell trips, surprisingly did come to roswell this year, and that he looked like brad pitt.

charlie, “while quite cute,”: doesn’t look at all like brad pitt. i got up and mailed him and told him about my dream; i think he’ll be amused.

now i am left with the unhappy problem of the westy. it’s _gotta_ leave the driveway today. i guess i’ll have to start it without the alternator and hope for the best.

also looks like it’s going to rain off and on all five freakin’ days that i have off. grumble.

wardrobe facets

so i went walking with mary and christa monday, then mary again yesterday. the first day, mary commented on the fact that i was wearing just my normal clothes and not workout clothes.

it made me think about the fact that, although my wardrobe has improved a lot over the last year or so– for those who didn’t really know me before, i wore a lot of boy’s t-shirts and jeans before i lost weight– i haven’t entirely made up for the fact that i bought almost no clothes for several years.

i have plenty of stuff to wear to work, and out with friends and shopping and stuff. i can use leftover clothes from before for working on the house, lawn, or car. but it never occured to me to buy clothes to exercise or do active things in. i guess this is because my exercise is mostly just walking and yoga, and those things don’t seem to need special clothes. well, for yoga i do wear leggings and a tank top. but i had those already, oddly.

my shoe wardrobe, stunning though it now is, also does not really encompass physical activity very well.

i’ve got some dressy clothes… i wish i had more opportunity to wear them, actually. i have this one beautiful silk dress that i’ve never worn. most people wouldn’t guess this about me (i think), but i have always loved to dress up, ever since i was a little girl.

i wonder what other facets of my wardrobe i’ve neglected without realizing it? i guess it’s hard to pretty much start from scratch.

i did have the happy and unique experience of attending my brothers’ high school graduation and party last year, and had the perfect thing to wear without having to go shopping. i even got compliments from my mom and my aunt joan, both total clothes horses.